Thoughts?

After the epic email exchange that happened the previous day, I did not expect this day to be overly incredible. The quantity of exchanges was not nearly as great, but the content was almost equally as priceless. Most of this was probably due to me being (slightly) out of my funk and her being well rested. As is the usual start to the day, Natalie sent a message. A passionate, billion topics filled email.

9:29 AM

Good morning! Oh my, did I need that night of sleep. I feel fantastic today. Sooooooo necessary. I like need sleep nowadays. That’s so old of me. So yeah, anyway… what’s the plan for tonight? I know you wanted to talk about stuff with Mark, but there is this sale at Macy’s for Veteran’s Day on rugs so I think I might try and stop in real quick today after work. You should meet me there then we can go to The Bar together afterward and convince Mark to come meet up with us after his office hours? Did you get work done last night? I actually worked on stuff at home. Yay for me doing work after working two jobs, woohoo! I have decided that Friday night I am going to stay in with a bottle of wine and just clean and caulk and do work and go shopping early Saturday. Then I can organize more and then… party time! And then Sunday will be devoted to work and laundry. Looking forward to massively productive weekend. Hope I can actually pull all that off. I think it cane be done. Just need to stick to the schedule. Ooooo and on Sunday, I may actually go grocery shopping too. In order to make Sunday productive, I will need to control myself on Saturday night. Hmmmm, not my strong point. Meh. I can do it!

Anyway, I thought I would start your morning with another glorious bored/save me emailing session. I think I might actually do work here today. Inspiration and GO!

Thoughts about tonight?

I like her grandiose ideas of being super productive on the weekend. She put so many things on her list, and I think it might be hard to get all of them done (and I think I end up being right and she was not as productive as originally planned). Anyway, her energy and enthusiasm jump right off the computer screen, and may have contributed to my own ambitions to have an equally productive day. Also, part of my crankiness on the previous day was due to lack of sleep because I start this day incredibly chipper.

9:38 AM

I too apparently needed sleep! Went to bed at like 11:30 last night and woke up about half an hour ago.

My plan for the day is this: take a shower after replying to this email, get dressed, head to campus. Wait, wait. Must make tea. Insert make tea before the shower and after the shower and after the getting dressed. Okay, then! Print out homeworks while I finish internship stuff (Ooh, or I’ll work on that on the train. Be that girl furiously typing away on the laptop). Grade homeworks. Class. More grading. Then office hours.

I’m holding office hours tonight because Mark and I switched so that I wouldn’t have to have mine when my cousin was here. Awww Mark. So sweet. Anyway, so I’ll be on campus and just hang out there until you’re ready to head to The Bar. And invite Mark! He might come with (I doubt it, but maybe) since he might go to campus after work and he’ll want to get all the grading done (he and I are on a very serious mission). But see what he says.

And I don’t know when I’ll have my serious talk with him. Might be soon, but I haven’t really decide the best situation for it or whatever. We’ll see how tonight goes just the three of us hanging out at the bar. He might actually have to talk to me then.

Okay. Shower time. Then working time.

Oh yeah, the answer to your question: no, I didn’t get a lot of work done. Even though I said, “yeah, let’s watch something I’ve seen a ton so I can do work while we watch.” Moral of the story: ‘Shaun of the Dead’ is too good not to focus on it.

My reliance on tea to function is obvious here. Look how many times I included it in my itinerary for the day! While I was definitely in a better mood, I was still being girly and whiny about Mark. More on that later. For a little clarification on the end of the email, I had talked to Natalie that evening. My roommates and I decided we would watch a movie, and for once I got to pick. And yes, that is a true statement (about the movie being too good to not watch). Worth it though. That movie is good every time. Did I say good? I meant amazing!

Okay, enough with the shameless plugging of a wonderful film. Back to the exchanges. They became short, simple, and sweet emails for a little part of the day, starting with Natalie’s reply to my message.

9:55 AM

Well done, my lady. Well done. Oooooh The Bar. Drinking, relaxing, seeing your face. All VERY exciting. So you have to be on campus until 7, right?

Oh look at her. Being super sweet to me and remembering my “work” schedule. Time to put her to work though on getting Mark to join us for a beer. He is far more receptive to her attempts to solicit his company because he assumes all of mine are shameless attempts to get some alone time with him (so what if they are?!).

10:18 AM

Yup, until 7. And I can stay there later if you need to do some shopping or whatever. Did you ask Mark about going? Or are you going to wait for that?

Efficiency! Immediate response!

10:19 AM

I’ll shoot him an email now.

I inform her that I approve of this decision about the only way I know how.

10:20 AM

PEW PEW PEW!!!

Yes, that is really all that I wrote in response to her email. I’m wonderful like that. She eventually puts it all together and finds a moment to reply.

10:36 AM

I read that and didn’t get it, and then read my message right above it and then your voice going “pew pew pew” came through my head and I just laughed out loud as a partner was walking by. He just laughed at me like I totally shouldn’t enjoy my job as much as I do. Hilarious!

So, email sent. I’ll keep you posted on the response.

PS. Just got to call the hot, young, seemingly single accounting manager. He’s gonna come pick up his package in reception. I’ll him a package, all right. Ooooh and the super busy/important/rich as hell CEO said hi to me today. By name! He just came to get the pack and he’s so hot. Nice butt, too. Yeah, you walk away like that. If only people could see my emails, I would so get fired. Anyway, back to work.

This email was probably where I got the idea to start the blog. Of course I asked her permission because of lovely gems like this. But seriously! Can you blame me? Shouldn’t more people see the awesome that is that phrasing? And you know you think things like that. I don’t care who you are, everyone has an inner monologue. Natalie (and myself) let ours out into the real world by including it in email form. As I’m giggling about this, she sent a follow up message that Mark would be joining us at The Bar. Fabulous! I respond with obvious excitement and newfound motivation for my day.

10:53 AM

Wooooooooo!!!!

And you are hilarious. Glad you figured out what I was saying just in time for someone to see. Food time! Then campus time!

It was around this point in the day when I either sat down to do work, watch some Netflix or head to campus. Well, all of those things happened, with very little emphasis on the work. I began to make my way to campus, and was able to check my email as I was waiting to change trains.

12:47 PM

So omg I literally just did so much work it’s ridiculous. I think I am literally turning into a workaholic. Hmmmm, let me think about it… reason my parents got divorced other than just not being right for each other? Oh, that’s right. They both wanted to work full time and disagreed who would have to stay home because they are both… workaholics.

Apparently, my leaving Natalie alone allowed her to be productive and have some deep meaningful realizations about herself. Part of her deep thoughts also included an analogy to working a lot to heavy drug use. Sometimes she’s addicted to productivity where as I tend to burn out from over productivity. Now, I could write back and be all happy for her abundant workings that have gone on and chime in with my own productivity on the train. Instead, I sent her a play by play of my adventures getting to campus.

1:07 PM

I have the worst luck with trains. Running late, as usual. Drafting this while I wait for the next train. Oh there it is! I did work the whole way here. Going to write this to you so I don’t forget that I need to play f(diffYandZ) and Y(diffYandZ). Woo! Sure you wanted to know that. Fun facts for you!

Writing emails on the train. I’ll hit send the second I get to campus. Probably going to make it in the nick of time for class. I’m terrible. So much for getting here early.

I blame Netflix. And flatmates. Mostly Netflix. Watching a terrible (might be good, not sure yet) movie about gay Mormons with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Rob McElhenney (one of the guys from ‘It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia’). Should be interesting. Okay. Next stop is me.

Thom Yorke is amazing.

So there I am, ranting as usual and including code into an email. Everyone wants to be my friend and receive such wonderful insights. Also, I love my propensity to include so many movie reviews and updates and such through email, which then allows me to share it through this blog. And for those of you dying to know, the movie ended up being pretty good (I can’t remember the title, but I think I gave a sufficient number of clues where you could find it).

The last line of that email might have been confusing for anyone, even Natalie. Lucky for her (and you), I sent a follow-up email shortly after this one.

1:51 PM

Let me elaborate, the “Thom Yorke is amazing” comment should also include that he is perhaps my favorite train music.

Theory time!!!!!! In the beginning of the semester, Mark and I would keep pace with each other with the grading. We would call each other to discuss individual questions and concerns and specific problems. We would routinely be like, “Okay, working tonight. I’m sure I’ll call you,” and we would. And it was great. But the past couple weeks, we haven’t done that. Like, at all. And I’ve tried to, but he always seems like “OMG why are you contacting me it’s just grading just do it”. I mean, he never said anything like that, but yeah.

So this might be a good segue into talking to him. Because it’s obviously affecting work now! And he’s going to look at our grading stats to see where we diverged, if we have at all. But yeah, I’m thinking it could be the key to the talking about serious things. Like, hey man. What the fuck. Let’s be friends. And really mean it. Stop being a fuck. We’ve had this conversation so many times. I’m sick of it too. Etc.

Thoughts?

The kicker? She never replied to this email! I’m sure she and I discussed it at some point. And the serious talk did not happen this night. It eventually happened, unplanned and spontaneous.

Shocking Conclusion

 Left off the last post with Natalie pondering her option of working from home because she didn’t feel well. However, at this point in her living situation, she still had not completely conquered the roaches, so going home meant going where they might show up at any second. I did what any good friend would do and offered some legitimate advice. Then jumped back into my usual stance of pretending that work will begin at any given second!

12:57 PM

If the boss is cool with working from home, you should do it. And by home, I think you mean my home. We’ll have a work party! Or you home could be good too, I guess. We can keep up the email chain so we’re right there with each other.

You probably could use a good night of sleep. Then you’ll feel fine. Chalk it up to being tired.

Hilarious thought I had while I was awaiting your reply (seriously me, you have nothing better to do but sit and wait for a reply?!). I was like “Maybe I should send Mark an email to tell him I’m not going to campus, but we should still chat about work stuff tonight”. And then I thought how hilarious it would be if the email went something like this…

Hey Sexy McSexface,

Not going to campus today. Call me. Let’s chat. About work things. Just work things. Okay, we can chat fun things too ;).

Love,

Me

World’s most awkward email? Yes/yes? Just hit him full force. Be all “al or nothing, bitch! Don’t be a pussy!” But that’s a lie. I don’t want nothing. I’d settle for non-awkward friendship. And if it’s him being all “waaaaaah! She likes me. That makes me awkward!” It’s like, really dude, wtfuck, what?! No. I do NOTHING that would make him feel awkward. I treat him less friend-like than I do everyone else because I don’t want to get too close or step on his toes or make him feel awkward. I work really hard for that! I don’t hug him even though I hug everyone else. There are probably other examples. Maybe after I’ve had my tea. Ooh! I’m going to both Roommate! I hear him awake!

It comes up very frequently that I have the attention span of a goldfish and I believe it’s wholly captured in my emails (with everyone, not just her). I also have great aspirations to be productive some days, but it doesn’t usually happen. At least Natalie will acknowledge my awesome ability to sit in front of my computer all day and not manage to get anything done. I mean, it’s still early in the afternoon.

12:59 PM

Awwww, you get gold stars today for the world’s best procrastinator! Now go do work, lady!

This time stamp is my least favorite in the day. Why? Because she goes from Job1 to Job2 at 1 o’clock, and Job2 requires her to actually do work the whole time. I was obviously devastated and expressed it as such via my quick reply.

1:03 PM

Yay gold star!!!!

And NOOOOOOOOOOOO NOT 1 O’CLOCK!!!!!! What will I do all day?!?!?!?! You were inspiring me to do work! To make a list! To do things! You should sporadically email me. Just for funsies. And you can read my ridiculously long replies when you need breaks.

Okay. Movie time. Work time. Woo time!

You would think that without the distractions of rapid exchanging of emails that I would get some work done. This day might have actually been one of those days where I actually was eventually productive. So I fired up the Netflix, did some work, and waited a whole three hours before trying to bother her again. Also during this break from emailing her, I had a conversation with my ex-boyfriend. I wouldn’t describe it as a distressful talk, but it was emotional, as they tend to be.

4:10 PM

My code is taking forever to run. It might be broken. And I’m afraid it won’t even do what I need to do. Sooooooooo yeah. We’ll see how it goes in a bit.

Then maybe I’ll take a break for some cleaning!!!!!

I have little to no motivation. Definitely crashing from crazy fun week o’adventuring. (Oh, and in response to an earlier email that I didn’t acknowledge, yes, my cousin is awesome!)

And right on queue, I’m being that girl about Mark. Just all day feeling bleh. (I think it’s all the emotion from chatting with the ex and what not.) Want to talk to him. Feel like I can’t. Going to send him a work email. Wish I could talk to him sooner rather than later, but I don’t want to make any of next week’s festivities awkward or weird in any way.

What are you doing on Saturday? Want to do work together all day? I’ll come up to campus and work with you if you want :).

Working is less fun without our emailing back and forth. Boo you and working hard.

If she really held on to my every word, that last sentence would be detrimental to her job. She apparently has better self control than I do, with work and boy-thinking and other things, I’m sure. The email jumps around because I feel like there was a lot going on in my head. Sometimes I have a hard time processing it all and writing it out seems to help organize my thoughts. I know it doesn’t look like it. This email touched on just about every subject we had covered already in the day but in a haphazard manner. Natalie is lovely in that she puts up with my shenanigans and eventually responds to me.

5:02 PM

Hahaha. So I just literally came to write you an email because I’m falling asleep here at my desk and don’t want to drink coffee because then I’ll get home wide awake and I want to go to bed early. But anyway, EXHAUSTED! This report is starting to kill me, but I love it and can’t wait to see it in its entirety. But anyway, so yeah, not able to even try and go home early because my boss was like, “Okay, and do this and this and this…” crazy! Speaking of which, I should get back to that. Hmmmm… diet coke! Yes! Okay caffeine intake engage!

Okay, work time.

And GO!

(And you lady better get things done so we can go out Thursday. Oh, and Saturday I am going shopping all morning then organizing in the afternoon (curtains, bookshelf, etc).

This time, I took her advice. My next email reply wasn’t for a little over an hour, so some proof that I must have been working. Motivation can come in many forms, and sometimes that is in the form of going out for a couple beers. Most of the email is more of my mopey ranting, but there was one gem within it. I won’t share it word for word, but just describe the situation.

I had spent that whole day sitting in my room pretending I was going to start doing serious work at any given second. The fact is that I just wanted to sit by myself and relax for a day. My roommates were doing yoga in the living room during the evening, and I didn’t want to interrupt it. In my reply to Natalie, I wrote that I had to pee. I proceeded to leave the email open and unsent, left my cave to run to the bathroom (which didn’t require bothering the yoga-ers), and came back and wrote “Back!” in the middle of said email. The only reason I’m including this pointless and boring story is to acknowledge that our emails tend to be like everyday conversation.

This might be the lamest conclusion to an email chain. I feel like it all started off very strong. The best part about this last segment might be the irony in the title. As the day wore on, we became more and more like real adults and less like procrastinating students. Well, one of us did. I continued to procrastinate and occasionally do a little work. Also, she has a real job (well, real jobs), and I’m technically a student. So I guess we were fulfilling our roles effectively.

Cliffhung

Sorry for the cliffhangers (if they could be considered that exciting to anyone but me), but here I am ready to complete the filling in the blanks and sharing of a pretty stellar (again, in my personal opinion) email exchange. The return to regular blogging will be aided by my traveling yet again. This flight is much longer than the last one I was on, so hopefully I can get caught up at least with this post and maybe prepare another post.

To catch up those of you who are too lazy to read the previous two posts (or if you read them the second they were posted but since it was so long ago you forgot what I was talking about), here’s a brief recap. Natalie and I are philosophizing and being girls and making plans and remembering the night before. There was a rapid exchange of emails that day as I prepared my brain to do some actual work. Don’t believe me? Check the timestamps. It’s a pretty quick back and forth, especially if you consider that Natalie is working and I was probably trying to find something to watch on Netflix and/or making tea (intense, I know). At the conclusion of the last post, Natalie had just explained how productive she was being and how she was going to concur the roaches that were attempting to infiltrate her apartment. As I believe I have addressed in some of the previous posts, I tend to have to make a list in order to get anything done. I like checking things off.

12:23 PM

A To-Do list! I should make one of those! Maybe after my shower. So I can think while I shower. Ps. I’m about to go take a shower. Then to-do list! Then doing things! Work things! Netflix things! I mean what?

I bet you’ll do better at the whole convincing yourself you don’t like the boy things. Fair warning though: sometimes you can convince yourself and then you see them. Happens to me everyday. But I’m such a girl about all of this, even more so than you. By like a lot. And I’m not a girly girl either. It’s fucking weird and gross and who am I?!?! But I can’t help myself, and I’m very much “live in the moment, go with the flow” kind of mentality.

Oh! I assume since the out-of-town visitor will be staying with you that we will all be going on adventures to celebrate the birth of one Mark? (And me too because I’m a greedy fuck and want at minimum a week of hardcore birthday celebrations amongst birthday month.) We’ll have to hatch some things. Or you hatch. Aka you plan with Mark (le sigh. Mark. Sorry, girly moment. Disgusting) and we’ll go from there.

Shower time! When I return, there will probably be more emailing! Maybe I’ll send you my to-do list!

Apparently I was too distracted thinking about boys (well, a specific boy) that I could not focus enough to make a to-do list, let alone shower. Notice that it’s about noon-thirty and I have been talking about making a list, getting off the couch, and showering for at least an hour. Just about the only thing I have accomplished is thoroughly entertaining someone while not doing my own work. Natalie appreciates it and joins in on the “let’s be super girly and borderline obnoxious in our discussion of boys” aspect of the email.

12:35 PM

I wish there was a word stronger than love because love is just not cutting it for how I feel about you right now. Ooo having a guest just inspired me to get my apartment all together this weekend. Mission and GO! I just need to stop getting drunk face all the time and this wouldn’t be lingering for so long UGH! MMMMM Kevin. Ooooops, girl moment, that boy. Ugh. Why does he have to be taken? Why does he have to be so normal and manly AND HAVE A HUGE COCK! I made a pros and cons list of him the other day, because that’s about the girliest thing I do when I am trying to convince myself not to like a guy and this time it totally failed because he has way more pros than cons.

Stomach just started hurting, like pukey hurting, I feel nauseous, not good yogurt?

Anyway, yeah my to do list got so long I have to start over and do it chronologically in order to allocate specific times in the day to accomplish said “to dos”. Horrendous. So anyway, keep emailing me until 1:00 so that I can be distracted from this horrible feeling in my stomach. Gross.

If you were to make a graph of this email she sent me it would start out as being really girly, quickly jump up to vulgar (yes, girls do say things like this sometimes when talking about such things because we really do talk about it) back to super girly to sad face you don’t feel well. Would be an interesting graph (and ultra nerd moment of the day of me trying to visualize what the axes would have to be to make this graph legible). Now, me being the good friend that I am, I have to help her through this difficult stomach-grossness moment.

12:41 PM

Oh man. I too have known the downfall of the pro-con list. That’s the biggest tragedy with Mark. Very very very few cons and an out of control number of pros. Like, OUT. OF. CONTROL. I will talk to him soon. This isn’t fair. We’ll see how soon. But ugh, stupid boys. I should have been more forceful with him back in the day when he told me everything. I should have put my foot down. I should have made it clear that I was willing to get hurt to have a chance with him. He’s that fucking special.

Don’t get drunk face! Get prepared face! Or get drunk face then prepared face!

Just looked over at my bed. I hope Johnny doesn’t drool. That’d be gross. I should do laundry anyway. So maybe I’ll do it this weekend. Or today. Or tomorrow. Or Friday. We’ll see. No rush. Except I want all my clothes clean before Tuesday.

Also, I was thinking about putting together cute outfits today. 1) That’s a gross amount of girly, 2) It’s just me procrastinating doing real work, 3) It’s pathetic because I just want to look cute so he’ll notice me and remember why he liked me in the first place, and 4) I hate putting together outfits in a rush so if I knew of some cute ones already, BAM! My life just got easier.

There was something else I was going to write… oh yeah! I forgot to make tea. MAKING TEA!!!

If I am awake for too long without tea, then my desire to be productive (which I keep alluding to throughout this exchange) is overwhelmed by my inability to function any longer. This is something all of my friends know about me and that you (the readers) will eventually figure out. I like to pretend that her delay in write me back was to give me substantial time to make tea. I will assume that I finally made tea at this point in our exchange and returned to my room to find her reply.

12:52 PM

I think the best part of this exchange is just the feeling that I am right there with you. Like really, right there. So I am starting to feel light headed and anxious for some reason. Feeling a little shaky and nauseous. Possibly just need a good night of sleep. Damnit self, there are not enough hours in the day for all that I want to do. I hate it!

There truly are not enough hours in the day sometimes. She continued that email talking about not feeling well and debated working from home. Tune in next week (not really but it’s catchy) for the shocking (probably not so shocking) conclusion!

I wrote a lot of words

Mini-recap from the last post. Our whole gang had gone out for a reunion slash send my cousin home with one more great story about going out in New York. The mission was a success on both parts, and the following day was partially spent emailing up a storm. Now, back to the story of Natalie’s reaction to Johnny spending the night and other girly conversations.

11:57 AM

So jealous Johnny’s in your bed. Awesome and hilarious. I love it! I am so mad that I have to be all responsible and such and not come on such crazy adventures with you guys. Boo being serious face. I definitely can’t be going out like that mainly because I don’t know how to seriously limit my alcohol consumption after I have one and then it’s all just downhill from there. Problem? Meh, probably not..

I do think you should be upfront with Mark. Just clear the air, put everything on the table so he can stop being emo around you. Definitely. (OMG, eating yogurt parfait with fruit and granola and honey, LOVE JOB1.) But anyway, once again, I am jealous of your Johnny-age, your couch-age, and your overall way more relaxed life in general.

I’m going to a birthday party on Saturday night. You should come with! I am going to try and stay home on Friday so that I can be not hung over on Saturday and actually get a few of the million things I need to do done. By the way, your cousin was awesome! Really cool guy. Go you for having such an overall amazingly cool family! Speaking of which, we need to plan our FL trip… Call Delta…now!

Love you!

So, The Bar Thursday?

My kingdom to have seen her face when she read the first email, especially because lately she had been having too much fun flirting with him. It was definitely just boosting his ego, but sometimes boys need that. And, if I had any male readers, they have just been alienated. My apologies, boys.

Her advice about Mark is legitimate. We’ll see how that all pans out. Also, I love her pause to tell me about food. I love food and tend to talk about it far more than any lady should, so I appreciate with other ladies do the same. As jealous as she is of me for my slacker lifestyle, I’m jealous her jobs provide her with two of her daily meals. If I want food, I have to get up off of my couch or leave the comforts of my bedroom to walk all the way to the kitchen and scavenge to create something out of my lack of real food. I really should grocery shop more often. Maybe some day. Sometimes I do have aspirations of being a for real adult. Today was actually one of those days, and I figured I should share with her (and then return to my usual lazy, girly self).

12:06 PM

I should be doing more work all the time. So the next couple days I am going to do that. Don’t know if I told you before, but a lot of times, I feel guilty for not doing work and not having a job an such. Now I’m just trying to get motivated. I think my body is partially crashing from an exhausting week and being emo girl. So double whammy to my work desires. Even though I’m going to get to work. After I finish writing a super long message to my ex in response to his life plan. Trying to be supportive, but also telling him why I’m hesitant. Also going to bring up the money he owes me. Also going to bring up the cat issue.

Johnny and Rachel headed into Manhattan. I was thinking of going to campus today, but I’d rather be able to do some cleaning and stuff when I take breaks. Johnny was like, “omg your bed is ridiculously comfortable. And really warm.” He thanked me for sharing half my bed. Awww Johnny. I should have snuggled him. Because he’s Johnny! And so snuggleable!!

Yesterday Mark and I talked about doing a ton of grading to get all caught up so we don’t have to worry about it for a few weeks (and it means taking birthday week off). Yes, that might be part of the reason I wanted to go to campus today. He said he was going to be up there basically everyday after work grading. He and I still have stuff to discuss work wise. Maybe I’ll just save that for tomorrow. Or have him call me tonight or something.

Ugh! He used to call me to discuss work stuff. Like, while grading. And we’d chat about fun things too. He doesn’t do that anymore :(. Why why why why why why why does he have to be like this?!

And probably The Bar Thursday, assuming I’m a good girl and get lots of work done today. I should make some tea! I need caffeine!

And the whole digression about the grading was to say I probably won’t go out this weekend. Or wait. That was before I talked to Johnny about watching football Saturday night. So I guess I have plans. I literally just remembered that. This is a stream of consciousness email (what’s “backspace” mean?). You’re welcome. Um, but yeah. Lots of work. Hopefully it’ll mean Mark and I doing work together. I bet he’ll get all weird if I’m like, “I’ll meet you on campus on Saturday to do some grading. That way we’ll have each other’s company.” Fuck. Ugh. We’ll see.

I wrote a lot of words :).

Yes, yes I did. Sometimes I write ridiculously long emails. It is really that I haven’t quite figured out the length of her attention span, and I am willing to test the limits throughout our exchanges in order to find the optimum length to get her to respond to all questions/comments/statement addressed in my communications. She responded positively, so I assume I am doing okay.

12:15 PM

Have I told you yet today that I love you? Like, seriously. I am sitting here giggling through your email and awesomeness! Don’t feel guilty about work and stuff. I definitely know the feeling but you just gotta motivate yourself, set goals, and stick to them, and you will feel way better about yourself. Deadlines are great, but only if you stick to them.

Otherwise, get to work so that we can go out Thursday so that I can flirt/read Kevin and his uninterestedness so that I can just get over him. Ugh, such a girl. So not my style. “I do not like him, I do not like him, he has a girlfriend, he is ‘in love’, I do not like him” thought process, and now I almost believe myself. Ugh!

I managed to not do any work for Job2 this morning except a special Facebook post. I made a list of To Dos, read two newspapers, and have had an exquisite exchanging of emails with you. Amazing. Mission this week… kill roaches! EWWWWWWWW!

It was a lovely email exchange. And it doesn’t stop there.

To be continued (again)… 

He bores her

Because sometimes the universe has perfect timing, I have a couple hours to kill as I fly back to New York and an email exchange that spans many, many pages. It will most likely end up being part of a mini-series (which might happen occasionally for days with excessive emails). Yes, it’s just that good. Well, I think it’s just that good.

First, a little setup of the events that took place the night before. As was mentioned in the last post, we had met up with some friends for a night on the town to conclude my cousin’s visit. It was supposed to be a laid back evening of a couple beers to show that New York isn’t always go go go. Well, I apparently lied and the night was a fantastic evening that ended far later than it should have but was well worth it. Natalie was only able to partake in the early part of the evening given her jobs and early alarm clock. Mark is in a similar situation (job plus alarm to get up in the morning), so he accompanied her home. The jobless (well, really we just have extremely part time jobs where we make our own hours) stayed out late playing. The morning after I woke up early and escorted my cousin to the airport. I returned home with the hope of a nap, but as is usually the case, I was unable to sleep. So I did what I do best and laid on the couch and watched a little tele. Eventually, Natalie rescues me.

11:29 AM

Hey. I am bored. Help me!!!!!

So anyway, how was the rest of last night? I managed to wake up late this morning. Still made it in on time, but definitely can’t do two 5-hours of sleep nights in a row. Last night was though. Always love hitting on Johnny. It’s becoming quite the hobby. Probably just boosting his ego unnecessarily though. Probably should stop that. Ha. Sorry I stole Mark. I tried to get him to stay, but he wouldn’t listen and I HAD to leave. This whole drinking during the week and then waking up early thing sucks. I think I may need to get another alarm clock Even though I set like seven alarms on my phone as is. It’s not that I totally sleep through all of them, it is more that I turn them off and then think I am going to get up again. Horrible! So I think I am going to leave work early tonight so I can get to the hardware store before it closes and arm myself with a ton of roach stuff so that I can kill them all and not have to feel uncomfortable in my own home.

Oh, she’s bored? I can fix that! I will share my tale from the night before since she didn’t get to witness our poor decision making skills.

11:39 AM

I was going to email you to say hi! Mostly, I’m avoiding doing work by lying on my couch. Why am I on my couch? Well, let’s go back to last night…

So the rest of the night was fun. We had one (two?) more rounds and then got the brilliant idea to go home so Rachel and Johnny could shotgun a beer. I was supposed to as well, but I’m crafty and yeah. Anyway, we drank more. Watched some TV. Hung out with my other roommate. Johnny spent the night. He’s still sleeping. He slept in my bed. Like, each on our own side. No snuggles or anything like that so get your head out of the gutter! He is definitely shirtless thought (I assume he has pants on, but I didn’t look. He did turn off the light before getting into bed). But yeah, hilarious and random and all things you would approve of. Except maybe the Johnny in my bed. Or maybe you do. He’s pretty adorable.

And it’s cool you stole Mark. You guys have to work and I totally understand that. Plus it’s fun having a subway buddy to chat with. And he wasn’t really talking to me anyway. He’s been weird like that lately. Like, not really talking to me if we’re out in a group, only when it’s one on one like yesterday afternoon. Which was lovely. Just prolonged conversation while avoiding doing work. Super cute. Good times.

But yeah, I can’t figure him out. I’ve been thinking about it all morning. Mostly, the text message thing. I never asked him why he read what he did. And Why he read so far back. And how he felt about it all. Just so many questions that I’d like the answers to, but I probably will never get to find out. Unless I awkwardly ask him sometime. Maybe I will. Just be more upfront and forthcoming with him. He’s frustrating.

Maybe I should have put a warning before that one. Like, “Hey, it’s about to get really girly up in here.” I believe I hinted in the last post about the Mark situation. I just can’t wrap my head about him sometimes (aka all the time). Also, right before Natalie left the night before, she told me she talked to him (reference last post and my comment about needing her to be my wingman). Short version: he doesn’t want to pursue anything with me, never did, and I make him feel weird. More on that later.

And the Johnny thing is funny because she kind of has a little crush (crush probably isn’t the right word, but it’s fitting) on him. I look at him more like a brother. She didn’t respond quickly enough and the Internet was not nearly as entertaining as I had hoped, so I sent her a follow up message of zero substance.

11:47 AM

Johnny is awake. And having a staring contest with Big Kitty. He bores her. She looked way. Entertaining enough for you?

That got her attention (or maybe she found a second away from doing work to appease my neediness with a response).

To be continued…

Necessary Email

Two days in a row, I started the communication, which is so not the norm. I think the opening to my email says it all. The rest of the email reinforces my habits of no structure to my emailing and how prone I am to boredom.

10:14 AM

Haven’t talked to you in like a day! WTFuck is up with that?!?!

How was working on things yesterday? It’ll get better/easier (yay cheerleader!)

I’m bored. I was going to do work, but I can’t get motivated. Letting the cousin sleep a little while longer before we head to a museum. Not even sure which one. Maybe I should look that up.

You going out for drinks with peoples this evening? I was thinking about emailing peoples about going out tomorrow evening. Or maybe I’ll just text that later. After we figure out the plan for tomorrow besides him coming to class with me.

Ummmmmm. Let’s see. What else. Oh yeah. Food yesterday was great. Comedy was also great. And then we came home and did work. Nerdtastic!

That’s all.

Ps. Look at me learning to entertain you while you’re at the job you can be entertained at!

Explanation of the postscript might be in order. Typically, Natalie emails me during Job1 because it’s her receptionist job, and she isn’t constantly busy. It’s her morning job, so I tend to sleep through about half of her shift. Her afternoon job is much busier, which is awful for me. It’s right around that time that I feel like I should be doing work so I start to look for ways to distract myself and avoid work. At least today I was doing it right. And it seemed to have an effect on her.

10:47 AM

So have I told you today that I love you? You’re hilarious. (Awww, thanks for noticing, Natalie.) I may go to a work function tonight or I’ll meet up with you guys. Not sure yet. So Saturday night was fantastic. David came over and we had sex all night and stayed up until literally 7am, which then made it so I slept all day yesterday (literally until 5, fan-fucking-tastic). But apparently I really needed the sleep because I was still able to go to bed last night at 10 and slept like a baby. Go figure. Anyway, it was really fun and just what I needed. So feeling great today, well rested, sexy outfit, doing work.

I saw another roach in my place last night. Totally freaked out again. This time it was in my living room which is REALLY REALLY not cool because now I can’t even relax on my couch without being paranoid. Definitely getting an exterminator in there this weekend, no questions asked. That’s half the reason I went to bed so early was because I couldn’t sit on my couch because I felt so uncomfortable (Ps. I tried to kill it with a book and missed and lost it!!!). Anyway, seriously can’t handle bugs. I was shaking like a leaf for like half an hour and then barricaded myself in my room and woke up throughout the night paranoid that there was one on my bed somewhere. HORRIBLE feeling! I have now seen three in there… meaning they are there and must be destroyed. Mission… GO!

So Job1 is having dinner and drinks tonight for the whole office. Should I go?

Anyway, keep me posted and feel free to continue to distract me :).

 She adopted my topic-jumping monologue style. All were important points, so it had to be discussed.

10:58 AM

Go you and your attempts at bug killing! Baby steps, my dear, baby steps. Someday you’ll be fine.

Well, cousin and I probably won’t make it out for drinks tonight because we’re going to the movie, but maybe tomorrow night drinks? So you could do both! You could go to dinner then meet up with everyone for drinks and convince them to go out tomorrow evening too. Just for a drink or two. Nothing crazy. Need to calmly wind down the New York adventures with one last small night/evening on the town. Also, I really want him to meet Mark. And I think Mark is trying to avoid that at all costs. Stupid boy. It might almost be Natalie wingman verbal-bitchslap-tastic time. We’ll see how this week goes. Meh.

Ummmmmmmm my hands are cold. There was a little sleet mixed in the rain. I had a couple pieces of candy for breakfast. I’ve been awake for a while. Should be grading. I think I’ll watch some Netflix.

So that middle paragraph brings a lot to the table. My cousin and I got to a movie screening - very New York experience for a visitor. Also, our friends wanted to meet for drinks as we try to do about every month or so. I was successful in steering others to go out the second night as opposed to the first. It was lovely and turned into one of those nights that ended later than planned. Worth it. And the Mark thing. That’s a long story for another day. The short version is that I am the girliest girl ever when it comes to him. It’s a little embarrassing, but what can you do? Someday I will regain my senses. Or win. Time will tell.

I would like to point out how great that conclusion of the email is. Definitely one of those emails that epitomizes the address of this blog.

11:03 AM

You are officially the queen of procrastination. I love it! I am calling you in like 10 minutes FYI…

Oh really…

11:04 AM

I’m answering your call in like 10 minutes FYI…

Yes, that was a necessary email. So was her response.

11:06 AM

Hehehehehe

Like a sailor

Sometimes the subject line is almost as good and important as the punch line. Today I started the email chain to Natalie, which is why it started in the afternoon instead of the morning.

3:56 PM

Subject: I just realized my throat doesn’t hurt that bad!

Body: And I had to share with someone!!!!!!

I’m obviously easily excited about the little things. The day before had been spent kind of complaining about it to her via email (and others that I talked to in real life). It was a warning in case I was going to bail on the usual Thursday night routine. If I give her a heads up, then she can’t be that mad when I do flake out. This is a lesson that anyone can take advantage. I go on to explain how I’m not completely better, and I believe the rambling in the rest of the email is evidence of this fact.

But yeah, if I don’t feel 100% (or very close to it) tomorrow, probably going to bail on The Bar :(. Tragedy, I know, but I need/want to be completely better for my cousin’s visit this weekend. Ps. Trying to convince him to watch football on Saturday. We play at 3:30. FYI: Might find a bar in Brooklyn. Something new. Spice it up. Etc.

But if I feel okay, can we still make it an early evening? I’ll make it up to you by going out Friday night (if he’s not too tired from traveling), and Saturday during the day. And other adventures. Gooooooooooood times.

(Notice how I set up a makeup date while also giving myself an out. Genius.)

Ps. I’m watching ‘Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs’. So fucking cute. I can hardly stand it.

Also, in the craziness that is my day, I’m going to have a not-so-fun phone call with my ex tonight. He’s fucking up his life even more than before. Honestly, I think he’ll listen to me. And I think he needs to talk to someone who understands him. Poor guy.

Okay. Back to grading.

Sometimes I swear like a sailor. Sometimes it happens while I’m talking about children’s films. Fucking deal with it. Also, the punctuated, short sentences tend to be how I talk in real life, and I love that it can be conveyed through text.

Even though I bounce from topic to topic, dropping bombshells about the ex and expressing my love of movies, sometimes Natalie will only focus on one aspect of said email. Her reply is just that.

4:21 PM

Well then. Funny you say you’re feeling better because I definitely woke up with a sore throat. Went to the doctor today and took the afternoon off. Anyway, you can’t bail on The Bar tomorrow. I need some stress relieving flirtation. Come on. 2 beers?

So psyched to meet the cousin! We will definitely show him a good time. When does he get in?

Keep me posted and keep resting so you feel 100%.

It’s like she didn’t even read the second half of the email! I can’t really blame her though. We all get a little boy crazy sometimes, and she focused on the part of my message that would lead her to the boy. We did end up feeling well enough to go to the bar. I believe it was one of those nights where we stayed later than we intended and most likely had more than two beers. And we went out the following evening as well. Stayed until bar closing time. The cousin watched football with me on Saturday. We drank and adventured all day that day. Actually, I think saying all weekend would be more accurate, as he and I had more adventures that Sunday that Natalie did not partake in. Details in the next post since I, too, had to wait for email to find out why she did not answer my phone calls and/or join us that Sunday.

Cuss you, Jay Baruchel

Today the emailing was a little behind schedule. Natalie in all of her over-achieverness was doing work at work. I did not wake up to an email, and the first one I received was her asking for grammar advice. Now, I enjoy doing a little writing here and there, but I will be the first to admit that I do not have the best grammar in the world (and admitting that here is a blanket of “don’t correct my grammar). At least it ended with her asking how I was feeling. This was a couple days after Halloween, and I had been feeling a bit under the weather. I replied that her grammar looked fine to me (again, “good enough” might have been a more accurate phrase to use). As for my sickness, it was primarily just a sore throat. After a few days of serious rest, I think it had more to do with not sleeping very much and enjoying the New York paced lifestyle a bit too much. Natalie had finished her work (I guess) with my grammar comment, so she was able to focus on emailing and comforting me in my day of sickness.

11:12 AM

I haaaaaaaate sore throats. They are super annoying. You should go down to the corner store and buy some ice cream for yourself because you deserve it. You gonna be okay to cook tonight?

The plan for that night (for me) was for my roommate and I to have a friend over for dinner and a movie. These plans had been made before the sore throat set in, but I was determined to keep them. So I replied to her with an air of “I can write a coherent email”, meaning I wrote one short paragraph.

11:23 AM

I’m going to get some popsicles when I go grocery shopping. And probably some throat spray stuff. I assume I’ll be good to cook. Or maybe I should have my roommate reschedule with him for tomorrow night or something. I’ll that to her. And make those decisions later. I should go get groceries. Maybe after this movie.

At least I was very focused on going to get groceries and being productive for the day. That, and watching a movie.

11:35 AM

You are amazing. I love you. I am excited for Thursday, for no apparent girl reason or anything. And I think I might hang out with David tomorrow night. So tonight will be a night of cleaning and computer program fixing spectacularness. I have decided that in the name of Job2 embarrassment, I am going to work extra hard there and not go out with them for like at least 2 more weeks. Someone doesn’t know how to control her drinking when she gets excited. And since my boss gets me excited, it’s just a recipe for disaster. That girl who was emailing me stopped by my desk yesterday and was like, “You had a pretty out of control weekend, huh?” still alluding to the rumor of my make out session, which just really makes me mad. I think probably because I already have been doing things I shouldn’t that for someone to add one I didn’t do just puts me over the edge.

I determined last night that the reason I was feeling down was because I have been doing things quite often lately that I know are wrong and I do them anyway. This, ladies and gentlemen, is detrimental to the soul. Time to be a good person and stop being so selfish. Altruistic Natalie activate!

Hahaha. Enjoy your movie love and be as lazy as possible to get over this cold.

I included every bit of this email for a number of reasons. The first is that it shows how the conversation jumps from bit to bit and the back to the original conversation that would be the continuing from the previous message. Also, it brings up our Thursday routine yet again while addressing extreme girliness and crushes (hers being on the bartender since mine was addressed in the previous email). Now, Natalie is a fan of the men-folk. If you haven’t gathered this yet, you will. The event that she is hinting at happened the previous weekend. A coworker accused her of kissing another coworker of theirs and would not drop the issue. Natalie is an honest person, especially when it comes to these kinds of things. She would admit it if it were true. To me, to the coworkers, to anyone. So it is understandable why it would upset her.

Obviously, she didn’t want me to worry as her happy-go-lucky vibe returns for the conclusion of said email. Her dwelling on the boy issue (or really, the mention of essentially three boys in one email) sends my brain that direction.

11:51 AM

It’s times like this that I wish I had a boy who could come over and just sit on the couch with me to watch a movie. Oh wait, that might actually happen! But he won’t snuggle. But the snuggling is what I really want. Maybe he would. Probably not. Oh, but I wish! A girl can dream…

While I may not have a boy to snuggle me, I do have a kitty that senses my un-wellness. She keeps jumping on my bed to get my attention then jumping onto the floor and running around in circles, chasing her tail in the sunshine. The whole time looking up at me to make sure I’m watching. So cute. Silly kitty.

And this movie is terrible, but I’ll finish watching it. Cuss you, Jay Baruchel, for being so talented that you can make a would-be shitty movie not so awful and totally worth watching all the way through.

I should do some work.

Ramble ramble ramble.

Entertaining you while you work counts as work for me, right?

Sometimes you just have a day when you are feeling extra girly. Today was one of those days, apparently. Some days you also feel more like a cat lady. Again, today was one of those days.

And for the record, he did come over to watch the movie. Dinner was good. The movie was way better than the movie I was watching during the emailing extravaganza of the afternoon. Snuggles were not had.

It's Thursday!

On this particular Thursday, Natalie was already excited for the evening ahead and did not waste any time sending me a good morning email. The subject line of the email was the same as the title of this post. The enthusiasm is palpable. 

7:50 AM

Emergency 911, Batman! I forgot my phone at home, idiot!

To go and get it, that is the question. The thing is, I can’t leave Job2 until 6. It takes about 45 minutes to get to campus from there. If I go home it takes 30 minutes and then another 20 minute walk, which is doable. However, considering the long day plus the walking, I think I’ll pass. So anyway, the moral of the story is… I will not have my phone. I know you have office hours until 7, so my plan is just to make it to you by that time so that I don’t need to worry about using said phone.

The email then breaks into a rant that I will spare others from. Sometimes you just mention something in an email and the next thing you know your hands take control and type out a mini novel. It happens. We are all guilty of it. Just know that the email ended with this:

And she was like, “Yeah, please just tell me if its NOT working.” Like, WICKED bitchy.

Sorry I am rating about this in email (hope you’re not reading this on your phone).

So anyway, you, my dear, have a super productive day so you can run away with me at 7 and just remember I don’t have my telephone.

Oh, that’s sweet of her. Acknowledging that the first emails I usually read in a day are on my phone because I’m too lazy to get my computer and/or sit up properly. She’s considerate and then motivational in the final conclusion of the email.

Once I lift my lazy head up enough to open my laptop, which was most likely right next to me, I send her an eloquent response.

9:23 AM

I’ll write a short reply to your rant: I’ll just wait on campus until you get there. That work? Probably the best plan. See you then!

For some reason that concluded the correspondence for the day. I suspect that we were both actually productive and earned our night out at the bar.

Note: The double post today is a result of being too stressed on Thursday because of a job interview. Yes, I had a job interview. No, it wasn't for a super for real serious big girl job, but a job I really want nonetheless.

World Series

After a weekend apart, Natalie and I had to figure out some plans for mid-week catching up. She had ventured home for a relaxing weekend with her mother. I had gone on a weekend road trip with a few of our other friends. Stories needed to be exchanged. So, it was kind of understood that we would set out for our usual Thursday night plan of going to The Bar. On that Wednesday morning, we began working out the details.

9:29 AM

So I have been really sick the past two weeks and today is actually first day that I feel better, which is GREAT! I actually have energy and can hold my head up without wanting to kill someone. Fabulous! I can’t wait to go out tomorrow. I literally was really sick all weekend at home and didn’t get to even enjoy it (other than the having Mom take care of me part). So anyway, a night out is certainly in order.

Poor Natalie. Being so sick she couldn’t even enjoy a weekend at home, but really, if you are going to be sick at home, at least Mom can take care of you. I don’t care how old you are, that’s always a nice feeling.

So while we tend to be incredibly girly in our conversations, talking about boys and shopping and the like, I have my boyish attributes that my friends just accept. Yes, I am all about going out for a night with my friend to have fun. However, this particular Thursday was more important. Why? Because I had a football game to watch!

10:51 AM

And omg so excited for football tomorrow night!!!! It’s my motivation to do so much work allllll day!! Can’t wait! Seriously! I hope we win! (I might have been a teensy bit excited about the game.) And someone (don’t remember who) asked why The Bar. I replied that I can walk in there and go, “Put my game on! Like asap and then some! Fuck the World Series!” And then get a free beer. Sounds like a ton of win to me (and seriously, fuck the World Series, but go Giants!).

I think that answers all of your questions.

When you live in New York, you should never really yell, “Fuck the World Series” in a bar, regardless of which teams are playing, but it happens. It is also why we go to a bar that knows us very well.

Now back to our regularly scheduled programming…

11:02 AM

I can definitely put off my shopping adventure until Sunday, but I need you to say you’ll go with me because otherwise I’ll just get it over with on Saturday. Also, it sucks you guys are going to be gone Friday and Saturday and I can’t come. Whatevs. I’ll find someone, I mean, something to entertain myself.

Boys and shopping.