Le Swoon List

For whatever reason, there was a lull in the emails. Maybe Natalie was getting settled into her jobs better. Maybe I was doing more than sitting around all day thinking about doing work instead of doing work and maybe I was actually working. Regardless, there was a lack of exchanging of brilliance and ideas and mundane “how was your day” communications of the email variety. Emerging from this dormant period was a two email day. The first being from Natalie asking about my weekend getaway I had taken with some friends. The only notable comment from this entire exchange is regarding a boy building a fire.

10:14 AM

Not too much drunkenness. Hilarious car rides, some hiking, a canoe trip, Mark built a beautiful fire (add that to my “le swoon” list), etc.

Let me elaborate on this “le swoon” list. Every girl has one. These things are facts. It is just a compilation in your head of all the things someone you are attracted to can do that will make you all girly and mushy over them. Apparently, my love of being warm can be satisfied by a guy knowing how to make a stellar fire. This also involved boys chopping wood. Very manly. Very le swoon kind of girl reaction.

So that was the only highlight. Our wit was so drained by the moving fiascos (yes, plural) that we couldn’t even have a standard email conversation. Unless they were deleted. In which case, whoops.

Jet Fuel

At this point is has been nearly a week that Natalie has been staying with my roommates and I. She works all day. I pretend to work all day. It is a great setup. Since she is a guest in our home, she is without keys to the apartment. I do what any good hosting friend would do and send her a “here’s my plan for the day” kind of email in the morning. When I say “morning”, I mean my morning, so more like her afternoon.

11:04 AM

Soooooooo text me whenever you’re done at work or whatever. I’m going to get groceries on the way home or something.

Mundane. Boring. Not the best email. Unless you are Natalie and you pick up on the procuring groceries part of the email. As a response, I get an email full of information and topic changes. Note: the lack of paragraph breaks proves how these emails just flow right out of our fingertips.

11:10 AM

I’m suspecting today will be a LONG day so don’t feel like you have to wait around for me aka feel free to go home and cook me dinner upon my arrival. Just kidding! Although that would make you the ultimate wife and I would rethink divorcing you for your roommate…just a thought. But anyway, I am assuming I will get out of work around 6 or 7. Oh and P.S. know how I was complaining that I was falling asleep at work. Well this morning I was rather tired and then in the break room I found coffee called “jet fuel” and guess what… it really is jet fuel! I only had one cup and I am wide awake and ready to go. Think that’s bad for my heart or something? Oh well, I’M AWAKE!

Anyway, good luck with your errands and keep me posted on your location and I will do the same.

This exchange is extra great. Why? Because it is caffeine-fueled rambling! And it ends with a very sweet husband-like message. And yes, for the record, I did make dinner that night. I was not lying when I concluded my response email with “ULTIMATE WIFE FOR THE WIN!!” because not only did I mention cooking dinner, I also threw in more wifely duties for myself.

11:15 AM

Decided I’m cleaning my room on Saturday. And I might do laundry tomorrow before I go to campus. If you have anything you to throw in, let me know.

Some people were just made to be great friends. Or wives. Or both. Not sure which. Regardless, the offer was extended, and how could she refuse?

11:21 AM

HAHAHA The best part is all I really need to wash is underwear. And possibly my PJs. That’s so boy of me, except for the frilly lacy part. BE PRODUCTIVE AND GO! AKA stop watching ‘Weeds’, slacker.

If you are a fan of ‘Weeds’, then you probably understand exactly where I was coming from. I had mentioned in the previous email that I could not do anything for the day until I had finished the episode. It’s so hard to not watch the new episode when it is sitting there right in front of you! Lucky for me, and rest of the world, I can get work done while I watch ‘Weeds’. Well, sometimes. This was one of those times!

11:24 AM

Weeds over! And so worth it! Did this emailing and eating while I watched! Multitasking! My tea must be kicking in! It’s my version of jet fuel!

I have noticed from all of this emailing that my use of exclamation points increases with increasing tea consumption. Jet fuel will do that to you. 

Moving Day

Today we have a snippet from moving day. Natalie was moving out of her apartment, but had yet to find a new apartment. Through a little working of the magic and having splendid friends, she found a temporary home for her belongings and a separate home for her. For one week, she lived this hilarious life. Orchestrating such a moving day is no easy task. As such, there was a significant amount of planning that went in to the actual event. Most of the discussion took place over email.

Moving day is always stressful, regardless of the amount of planning. If you have a glass half-full kind of friend, like myself, you usually end up with unnecessary amounts of encouragement.

In the early morning hours, Natalie does not have as much to do at work. So I woke up to a mundane “here’s what happened today” email with this conclusion:

8:23 AM

AAHHHHHHHH How am I ever going to get through this day?

I snap into comfort mode and try to alleviate some stress with humor. If you have a nerdy friend like me, then you will get a response that goes something like this:

9:51 AM

Also, how big of a car are you getting? Fun fact: I’m awesome at Tetris and therefore packing up cars, so I should definitely be part of the moving team.

But does the amount of good friendiness stop there? Of course not! As the day drags on, Natalie begins to feel the weight of the day and pressures of her life. I emerge from the subway at my job to find a less enthusiastic email:

12:21 PM

I feel so low right now, like I want to cry. Cheer me up, please?

And cheer I shall!

1:19 PM

Why are you all low and sad face?!? You have so much going on and you’re doing so well in your life! You have a job (that pays really well), that allows you to live the life you want (you get to have an apartment all to yourself), and you can still do all of your research projects. You life in New York!! You have me (and I have you!). Boys fall at your feet in a single glance! You can have anything and everything that you want! I love you. Smile. I’ll call you when I get out of class. Did you get my text? Do you need cake? Ice cream? Ice cream cake? We could obtain those things. If you don’t want to go out tonight, we can go home and paint our nails, eat, drink, and watch crappy movies if you want.

And be happy you aren’t me. No job. No desire to even get a job. Probably going to end up bartending. And pining over a guy who doesn’t even care or notice even though he once did.

This sets the tone for the email antics that are rampant in our daily exchanges. There is cheering up going on from both sides. The subject of boys will come up often, as it will between girls. We have other topics, but let’s face reality here. At least we try to keep it lighthearted. And I’d like to go ahead and apologize for my tendency to be slightly self-deprecating. It is something I have tried to work on. Maybe in putting it out for the world to see I will see how truly unappealing it is and eliminate it from my communication.